Your date is going to pick you up, or you're going to pick them up -- at what is probably their whole entire house, not apartment. Early on in my bartending stint, I met a woman who was carrying on an affair while her husband was on his final deployment overseas.I knew this because everyone in town was abuzz about it, whispering about her -- and her husband, and what would happen when he came home.They hold car doors even though the vehicle isn't fancy; pay for dinner even if they don't have a lot of money; and give you their gloves even if it's -30 out (yes, it gets that cold here).
It felt absolutely bizarre to know so much about the personal life of someone I hardly knew.
But I learned quickly that this was par for the course when you live in the middle of nowhere.
After four years of college in Massachusetts, I spent a mostly single half-decade in Manhattan dating people from every borough -- but it wasn't until I moved 350 miles away to the absolute middle of nowhere that I found a dating culture richer, more fun, and far more enjoyable than anything Manhattan had to offer.
Redwood is a 600-person hamlet along a tiny speck of road 10 miles from the Canadian border in rural New York.
I'd never tended bar before, and loved listening to people's stories while pouring them generous shots of clear and bronze liquors; snapping metal caps off Genny Light and Busch bottles; and dutifully scribbling notes in my reporter's journal behind the bar.
In cities, you can visit 100 different bars on 100 different nights and not run into any of the same people.Now, going out with guys in other, busier parts of the world where chivalry is lacking, is strange.This whole "I don't want my date to know where I live because he/she might be a serial killer" thing just doesn't exist out here. ) for anyone you go out with, you're basically guaranteed to come out of the encounter unscathed.North Country is more Alaskan than Manhattanite: people here travel by ATV or truck, hunt and garden their way to full bellies, and feel largely intolerant of annoying downstate legislation like gun control.An uninitiated city girl without friends (or SO potential) in this new world, I picked up a two-night-a-week gig slinging beers and well drinks to the locals at one of Redwood's gin mills.I've never suffered through a date in the country that felt remotely close to the endless reel of interview-like coffee dates my metropolitan friends drag themselves to.